Hari raya is just around the corner and tis' the season to be compulsively and compulsorily sorry.
Hence, I am dragging my sorry ass to make a blanket apology to the masses, because you never really know who you've wronged.
Though a blanket apology sounds cold and insincere, rest assure that this comes from an inquisitively remorseful state of being.
Ayo, I love technology because it eliminates the effort of having to write raya cards and choosing who to send sorry sms-es to.
Through the internet, I declare my mortality to the world and reinforce that "To err is human, to forgive is divine". Hence, presenting the world with the metaphorical chance of divinity. Told y'all I was generous! Hmmm, chimnology.
Selamat hari raya and may God forgive you for eating copious amounts of ketupats and rendangs. God is all-forgiving. My stomach fats, not so much.
Now, my stomach is four layers. Two more layers and I can call it a six-pack. Word up sun tzu-ni, you got beef, come see me.
Here is my raya song dedication to all, though it is not a raya song but who cares lah kan. Halaka Ukelele maintain babe, Mama made a baby. (I'm not psychobabblin', it's from a song plus/minus a few words)
Amen. I mean, Amin.
P.S. I'm going to hell after this post. Fo sho.