Friday, March 21, 2014

We'll always be different. You like green, and I like blue but that doesn't make the grass less green or turn the sky more blue. Our biasness are stemmed from our own deductions of our experiences. But the plant grows from the same soil, and is nurtured by the same nutrients. When light touches, carbon dioxide becomes oxygen, life is photosynthesized. I know myself enough to know that I would take an argument from the tribes in Sulawesi to the British Colony, because I believe in my fight. If it threatens that which I hold dear, my reaction would be unkind and improper. I would say alot of things, because its easy to pick the details, package it, wrap your resentment around it and present to you 'how you fucked it up so bad'. I'm so good at it, it makes me miserable.

I repeat. I'm so good at it, it makes me miserable. The ironic thing is that winning an argument, and assigning blame doesn't make anything better. So why do I bother with my version of 'right', only to allow everything to go wrong?

You don't kill a nation because of one man's misdeed. What you do, can't be undone, but before you do, look at the person behind the deed. Along the way, I messed it up, I set myself a belief system of right and wrong, and made myself the monochrome judge. Oh, the grey matter which is my brain.
The deed could be black or white but rationale tends to be a gradient of colours that blurs the line. In between light and darkness, there is space. And we need space to make mistakes, to learn, to grow and to move into the light.
I recently read about dethroning yourself from your centre, and allowing others to be your focus. This allows you to transcend into a higher state of being. Of course, I like getting high, but/and its not like I'm the Dalai Lama or a zen master. This idea of compassion seems to make alot of sense. I also recently watched Ender's Game and saw this quote:

"In the moment when I truly understand my enemy, understand him well enough to defeat him, then in that very moment I also love him."

This was the first time it appealed to me that a battle can only be won with compassion. I think those words weigh heavy, and I'm ashamed that I do not deserve to utter it, because my action lacks conviction, but I'm sure you guys are compassionate people who understand where I come from, right?

love & light, adrenalene

3 comments:

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d:hdkn said...

On an unrelated disclosure. As extraneous as it may occur; you are my all-time favourite nonprofessional, well-rounded nonsense, blog-writing-wordsmith, and a provider of nourishment for our thoughts, writer, ever.
You're a true Space Cadet with a mind of The Weird Recluse.

By far it's been therapeutic. Thank you.


pee'ass: ilyloml

Anonymous said...

On another unrelated note, you is my favourite ninja-lovin' macaroni but why u never update ur tumblr secretly crushing openly stalking.

ttylwf