Wednesday, January 21, 2015




So, I have a new girl crush on Sia.

I think that this music video is beautifully executed. There are two characters battling each other in a cage. The girl is the stronger character and she fights fiercely with the boy, who seems to be a little fearful. Towards the end, the girl escapes the cage, while the boy is angered and tormented. She comes back into the cage and comforts him. In the end, she goes out of the cage, and tries to help the boy escape but he remains trapped.

It is possible that the bigger reason the girl is stronger is because she can leave the cage at any time. She isn't trapped, the boy is. Hence, the boy is the weaker character. When she left and saw that he was still suffering, she went back in. My guess is that either she empathizes with him or that she doesn't want to be free alone. Empathy is a funny thing because she was part of his torment and it took him to pain, before she begins to comfort him. Then she tries to help him escape but  in doing so, she takes some of his pain and now even if she leaves, she was as stuck as he was, if her objective was to free him.

Four walls and an unlocked door makes a room. Four walls and a locked door makes a prison. You could stay longer in an unlocked room but a locked door that you do not have the key to, makes you feel trapped. A door is door. A lock is lock. A key is a key.

When I was in the hospital and I couldn't move much, I felt like my body had become a prison. Now that I am discharged, I feel like I'm on probation. So what was my crime? In the end, we're all guilty. 

If my body is a cage, is my heart and mind the door? Who has the key? But more importantly, what is the key? Beats me. 

Recently, I went to a place of discomfort. I fell on a path and found myself retracing my past. It is up to me which moments I choose to string together to tell the story of who I am today and how I got here.

Your life ends one moment at a time. How many deaths have I died? They say sleep is the cousin of death. You already know that I love visiting my relatives.

Good night.

love and light, adrenalene

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