Friday, April 17, 2015

I met my little kitty today. I always look forward to sharing moments with this cute little girl who has an infectious smile and a pretty pair of eyes. Her little reactions never fail to amuse me.

We went to a place that seemed a little off the grid so I could prepare my route there in future. I fell off my chair again today. This was the third time I fell in the span of a week. I barely know how to feel about it. 

In her attempt to comfort me, she told me that if I fell down 3 times, I get up 4 times. I don't know which school she went to, but I do prefer her maths. Perhaps my mind isn't of a big enough surface area to wrap my head around it.

I wish I could make sense of these numbers and figures, and find a place, a balance, that fits in this equation. I wish I knew the variables from the x & y.

I thought that in the bigger picture, even in randomness, there is a pattern. So how could things be void of meaning. How could existence be void of life. How could life be void of hope. But all I am is the void of a deck, on a sinking ship, pointing back home, where the heart is, whereever that is.

If I could connect these dots and find meaning in this constellation, would my current coordinates earn a placement? Is meaning found or forged? I yearn for that moment of clarity, which have been further and fewer in between.

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